A Whale of a Tale


I’d just polished off my sixth Budweiser and was half-asleep when I felt someone plop down in the sand beside me – a beauty with sea-green eyes and white surfer girl hair that rippled like waves around her hips.

“Well, hello, beauty,” I said, staring into those mesmerizing eyes, “what’s your name and where the hell did you suddenly come from?”

“The name is Lorelei and I’ve just walked out of the sea.”

“Sure you did, baby,” I grinned, “and your old man’s name is Neptune, right?”

“I see you know my family,” I think I heard her say, but I can’t be sure; I was too busy staring at the webbing between her toes.

Β© 2015 All Rights Reserved Kate Loveton, Odyssey of a Novice Writer


Note: Story written in response to “Lillie McFerrin Writes” and her five-sentence fiction challenge (found here). This week’s challenge is to write a story utilizing the word “waves” in just five sentences.


About Kate Loveton

Aspiring novelist. Avid reader of fiction. Reviewer of books. By day, my undercover identity is that of meek, mild-mannered legal assistant, Kate Loveton, working in the confines of a stuffy corporate law office; by night, however, I'm a super hero: Kate Loveton, Aspiring Novelist and Spinner of Tales. My favorite words are 'Once upon a time... ' Won't you join me on my journey as I attempt to turn a hobby into something more?
This entry was posted in My Fiction and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

37 Responses to A Whale of a Tale

  1. wildbilbo says:

    Still chuckling πŸ™‚
    Nice work. KT

  2. Margaret says:

    Just one word, “Perfect.”

  3. Another great piece of writing, Kate! πŸ™‚ ❀

    I love the line about the beer too, such a man thing to get 'beer goggles'! πŸ˜†

  4. It’s the little things… πŸ™‚

  5. My style is different and I prefer yours but that is the second time you wrote an alternative version of something I wrote. The first line of chapter one begins with me alluding to a mermaid at the door.

  6. Only six Budweisers to make a guy this bleary? Ha ha. This story in five sentences takes the cake… er takes center stage. Love it! ❀ ❀ ❀

    • Kate Loveton says:

      Now, Tess… Budweiser doesn’t have half the alcohol content of one good glass of wine, does it? So you and I, wine lovers that we are, will laugh at this poor fellow’s inability to hold his Bud.

      He sees mermaids after several beers. After several glasses of wine, everyone looks like George Clooney to me. That can be a very dangerous thing! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ (Just kidding, Mr. Loveton, in case you’re reading!!)

      • Good point, Kate. Many years ago, I recall being in Florida on vacation. Can you believe the weather was cold and useless for exploring. My main squeeze and I ended up in a bar all afternoon; he caught up on some ballgame on the television there and me bored. I must have had four Buds and felt no different than if I’d been drinking colored water– well I do believe I didn’t feel blue anymore. πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  7. Julia Lund says:

    I want to know the rest of the story now πŸ™‚

  8. Tidalwavelet says:

    And the only thing that saved him was his love of music. Lorelei couldn’t hold a candle to Alison Krauss and so she left him be, and he became, “the one that got away” – for now. Be careful with that minor deity, Eugene, she’ll be back……..

    • Kate Loveton says:

      Hi there! I am so happy you picked up on the name ‘Lorelei’ – with an extra 100 words, perhaps I could have made this a more musical tale!

      Do mermaids sing? T.S. Eliot seemed to think so.

      • Tidalwavelet says:

        In my mind this tale ends with Lorelei – now “Lurleen” fresh from study at Nashville, luring our fisherman to his doom with a flat-out killer version of Walkin’ after Midnight.

  9. Men and their beer goggles. Loved it Kate!

  10. Ah – a foot fetishist! But why did Lorelei come out of the sea just there, just then. And why did she choose him. And what are her plans?

  11. jan says:

    Leave it to a guy! A beautiful woman shows interest in him and all he sees is her webbed feet! Great job!

    • Kate Loveton says:

      I love that comment, Jan!

      Geez, men are so picky, aren’t they? A little webbing between the toes and they can’t hear a word you say…

      Glad you enjoyed. πŸ™‚

  12. Deb says:

    Ha! Made me laugh too! You certainly have a great imagination!

  13. noelleg44 says:

    This gave me my smile for the day – filtered by the beer!

    • Kate Loveton says:

      Ha! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

      It was fun to write! This one came to me when I was taking a walk during my lunch hour. I could just see this guy laying in the sand, a few beers too many in the heat, when this gorgeous creature comes up to him and says she’s from the sea…

  14. Beer makes everything believable to the imbiber and nothing to the observer.
    Terrific story.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s